Great Expectations
All the worlds wisdom spells out loud and clear that - "Expectations are the source of all our miseries". Greater the expectations greater the misery. Hence finally, at some stage of our life, we do ask this eternal question - 'To expect or not to expect?'
Is it possible to have 'expectation less' relationship with self or others? I don't think so!! May be the currency of expectation exchange is different in every relation..love, attention, money, respect, time, care, compatibility..be it any currency, underlying of all these exchange of currencies lie the 'Great expectations'!
Expectations are from self or others. It can be valid or invalid expectation. Yet, all expectations, if not fulfilled, will surely cause hurt, without fail, in the degree and intensity of which the expectations were set.
Expectations can be set by self and others. If we plot the combinations.
1. Self expectations from oneself.
2. Self expectations from others.
3. Others expectations from us.
4. Others expectations for themselves.
If we look closer, the option 1 and 3 may generally translate into voluntary and involuntary expectations respectively.
First 3 options surely have direct impact on oneself and 4th option may have indirect impact.
Why do we have expectations in first place? If we scrap beneath the surface, it must be the deeper individual 'needs', which gets manifested in the form of 'expectations'. So I guess, as humans all of us are designed to "expect" and cant escape it during our life time!!!
And how boring life will be without any expectations?
So without attaining the sainthood and being "expectation less". How do we safeguard ourselves from the hurt of unfulfilled expectations?
Well the logical answer seems to be
1. Set only valid expectations from self and others.
2. While setting the valid expectations too, set "rationalized expectations" from self and others. More the regulation of the valid expectations, lesser is the impact of the hurt that follow.
How do we know the expectations are valid or invalid?
Well just ask this very question w.r.t the relation one is setting the expectations? Invariably the instinctive and honest answer will confirm the validity or otherwise!!!
So my individual answer to the eternal question is - "To expect for sure, but have rationalized valid expectations".
Happy Expecting :)
